Put Your Own Oxygen Mask On First
“Put on your oxygen mask,” my sister said over the phone. It took me a minute to grasp her meaning.
“Oh, you mean like put my oxygen mask on first so I can help Donna? Like what they tell you on the plane?”
My housemate and friend had hit a health crisis. After two overnight emergency room stays within the week, leading to a two-night stay at the hospital, we were home, still needing answers. Somewhere along the way I picked up a cough that I couldn’t shake. My sister wanted me to get to the doctor and get help for myself, knowing I’d just keep going until I couldn’t if I didn’t have someone prodding me.
How Can I Help Others If I Don’t Take Care Of Myself?
My sister’s words motivated me. It had been a hard week. Little sleep. And what sleep I had was interrupted by the medical staff constantly in and out. Since we had no idea what was ahead, I needed to be ready.
I made a trip to the doc’s office that morning and picked up the meds she prescribed, knowing sleep would also be part of my needed therapy. I hoped God’s plan included rest in my schedule.
That night, a friend texted to see how Donna was doing. In my reply, I included the fact I was battling a little something and thanked my friend for praying for us. I also asked about her. She cares for her husband whose health has declined.
My friend shared briefly and then ended her text with a reminder for me to take care of myself. She says she hears that every day from someone and knows it’s hard to do, so she was telling me, “Take Care Of Yourself!”
Don’t you love it when our Father repeats Himself to you? Put on my own oxygen mask first. Take care of myself. Repetition. To get through to me that unless I take care of myself, someone may need to take care of me. How can I help another if I’m not well myself?
Repetition Is Good For My Soul
If two times is good, maybe three times is better.
Friday morning I logged-in to the kickoff for the monthly virtual writer’s retreat with Christian Book Academy*. I love hearing CJ and Shelley Hitz lead us in a devotion and prayer time.
That morning CJ read Luke 5:15-16.
However, the report went around concerning Him all the more; and great multitudes came together to hear, and to be healed by Him of their infirmities. So He Himself often withdrew into the wilderness and prayed.
CJ spoke about Jesus’ need to retreat for time with His Father in order to be able to minister to the multitudes who followed Him. If Jesus needed that, how much more do we need it?
Then CJ said words that solidified the fact my Father wanted me to pay attention.
“Put on your own mask before others.”
What?! Again? Hearing the same analogy twice in two days, with a plain English version of the analogy as well for added emphasis, I knew my Father was speaking to me.
Self-Care Is Not Selfish
How do we know caring for ourselves isn’t selfish? After all, some have said it’s better to wear out than to rust out. Isn’t time spent on ourselves petty and self-centered?
Why are we told to put on our own oxygen mask before helping a child or another loved one with theirs? Why is a life guard supposed to have on his or her life vest before rescuing a drowning swimmer?
If we’re not prepared for whatever effort it may take to help another soul, we may find ourselves unable to exert the energy needed at their time of need. Pure-hearted self-care is love at its core.
Jesus, answering a scribes question as to what was the first commandment, said,
‘And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment. And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.
Mark 12:30-31
How can I love my neighbor as myself, unless I love myself? Doesn’t that mean I need to take care of myself as I would want to take care of another?
Practically we know we aren’t any use to others unless we’re well and able. But also, spiritually, we’re of little value to others unless we spend time with our Father, obeying the first command to love Him above all else. And then we can care for others the way we care for ourselves.
Practical Application
While we don’t actually have to put on oxygen masks in our everyday lives, we do need to be ready for whatever comes our way. Sometimes it’s a rude driver cutting us off in traffic, and we need to respond without anger. It may be a medical emergency, and we need to have our wits about us in order to make the best decision for the moment.
Some days it’s something as simple as enjoying a party with friends and having the discretion to speak only good about others while enjoying our visit. Other days it’s as devastating as a global crisis or personal loss, and we need to be prepared to walk through the fire with our hands in the hand of our gracious Lord Who already walked through hell for us.
How Do We Help Ourselves?
Taking care of ourselves may seem hard, especially during a crisis. Sometimes we aren’t able to do everything we know we need. But here are a few suggestions on how we can help ourselves regularly, whenever possible.
- Spend time daily with the Father, just like Jesus did. Read His word and hide it in our hearts so the Holy Spirit can bring it back to mind at a moment’s notice.
- Let our bodies have the physical rest they need. In this 24/7 high-tech, fully digital world, it’s too easy to stay plugged in too many hours a day and not allow ourselves the sleep God designed for us.
- Honor the Sabbath. God made mankind to work six days and rest one. One full day of not dealing with work. Our world doesn’t know what that looks like now. Try it. You just might like it.
- In honoring the Sabbath, we might find emotional and mental rest joining the party. Honoring the Sabbath simply is a way to remind ourselves and God that He is God, and we are not. We can let go of the worries from the week and leap off the side of the pool into the arms of the One Who loves us and promises to never leave us or forsake us. It refreshes us, enabling us to go into another six days in His strength.
- Stay connected to others who love and honor our Creator. When we have a crisis, their care is the support God intended to help hold His people up.
Self-Care vs. God-Care
Books have been written on self-care. This blog post is not meant to be a complete text on that topic. But when my Father spoke the same words to me more than once in a short period of time, I knew I needed to take notice. The fact that our Abba loves us enough to tell us to take care of ourselves speaks volumes to me.
In John 15:5, we read where Jesus spoke to His disciples.
I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing.
Pure and simple. Without Jesus, I can do nothing. God has created me with abilities and talents. He puts me in places where He gives me a voice or an opportunity to help others. But unless He supplies the breath and health, I am no good to others. Unless He gives me wisdom, I can’t make good decisions or help others who want my advice. And for sure, without Jesus, I can’t live the life He intends me to live full of grace and truth.
True self-care means letting God lead me in caring for myself as He wants me cared for. Then I can enjoy fellowship with Him. And I can be ready for whatever He knows my days will hold.
Prayer
Today, Lord, let me put on my oxygen mask first. Let me spend time with You in fellowship and in Your word so that as I go into my day I’m ready for whatever You bring my way. Let me hide Your word in my heart so Your Spirit will have an arsenal to fill my mind when the enemy wants to lead me astray. Let me choose not to waste Your time filling my days with trivial matters that keep me from being rested and ready for whatever each day holds. Thank You for loving me with an everlasting love. You don’t need an oxygen mask, for You are the breath we all need. I love You, Lord. Thank You for loving me. Amen. And Amen.
(Photo: Taken by Carolyn Thigpen, April, 2016, Western USA; Scripture: NKJV; *Christian Book Academy is an online membership support for Christian writers, led by mentors Shelley and CJ Hitz.)
